Cheers to smiles

It's come around,
I looked back at all the photos,

"Reasons to smile"

& I can smile
again
as I once did.
Life has changed.
I drink socially, not at parties.
Belief is Karma.
Truth is needing some tweaking.
Friends are married,
engaged,
But I have spent time enjoying the simple company.

"Friends are like clovers; hard to find and lucky to have"

& I am reminded to smile,
laugh,
& love.
Thank you dear friends.
I'm ready for what the next journey lies ahead.

"Be just, and fear not."

Dry flower

Remember when you where young?
Mothers treasure chest, you'd find her white dress.
People always told you,
'develop in you the perfect him'
So you did.
Ballet classes.Piano recitals. School show cases. Hours of practice. Lessons attended.
Special occasions typically brought flowers.

Symbols of what?
Efforts closer to perfection. Caring love. Appreciation of you. Birthday's.

Even water couldn't stop the wilting.

They told you,

'so it is, life'

You believed.

Life eternal. First impressions. Ever lasting love. Pain diminished.

Introduction to society brings truth

Change belief?

you ask,

'talent told for what,

lord can you hear me now'

White dress, just to wear. dreams, so sorry.

Preserve it for memory

dry.

She changed her, when she couldn't change you.

Truth

Better keep yourself clean and bright. You are the window through which you must see the world.

"In the end, the number of prayers we say may contribute to our happiness, but the number of prayers we answer may be of even greater importance."
- Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Don't let yesterdays disappointments overshadow tomorrows dream

“Imagination is more important than knowledge. For while knowledge defines all we currently know and understand, imagination points to all we might yet discover and create."


If we are what we belief then I am psychotic.
My life is not 'normal' (per-say).
When I was young I believed (*indicate now):
-Hope in a person is better than a fear of deprivation.
*Hard to keep.It is the person we are, who creates the bond to the rest of the world my dear.

-Faith creates miracles.
*There is something that is much more scarce, something rarer than ability. It is the ability to recognize ability.
- Robert Half

-Knowledge just was.
*Crave.Thirst.Indulge.

-Mother would be the one to understand everything.
*To hide my tears is easier than for you to understand them.

-Love most personally was a fairytale.
*"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. "

-There was only one you
*biology nerds, cheer freaks, heart broken, caring individuals.
&Best friends are not hard to keep, or find.But a Hannah is.


-Best friends where singular.
*The seasons have changed from present to past.

-Lies where seldom

-Recalling a name was not for intentions of Discovering an old time friend.


.make it easy, again.
Life.Time. Reflection.

In every way.

Acceptance.

Truth
No matter the degree of agreement, the difference is not compelling.
You understand me threw every pore.
Honest
Words are pure.
A common lack in the present world.
Love
Is showed best threw your simple truths in my moments of blindness.
knowledge
From life, you share.
Of academics is impressive.
Folish
Rarely. But understood.
Amazing
in every way.
Belief
Karma. Wouldn't you agree?

Best friends are not hard to keep, or find.
But a Hannah is.

"limitless is your potential. Magnificent is your future... if you take control of it."
Perfectly imperfect&bitterly sweet.If you need to fall appart, I can mend a broken heart.
One standard only: honesty&honestly.
Curiosity has got the better of me."some times that mountain you've been climbing..."
Love almost any one, flaw or flawless?

I accept any one, for everything they are. I don't judge, and I am not judged. I am loving to many and loved by many.
I enjoy a little bit of everything. Parting in the club
or ridding out in the back country.
*Movies, Chick flicks: What happens in Vegas, 500 days of summer. *Hikes.*LLLLLLOOOOOONNNNNGGGGwalks.*Music:country first, &on it goes. Jason Muraz, Feist, angels and air waves, Gregory, plumb, Andrew merit. *Sunset, stars, sunrise:
"A beautiful girl cannot be beautiful if she doesn't learn to apprechiate the beauty around her."
Goals

achieved: doctor, Dance in Cali., never grow old, Live happily ever after: I have come to the fact that we may never talk again, & at the time it hurt, but for what it's worth these unsaid words are developing everyday
"if I learned anything at all it was to always be true to yourself." -Thanks Austin.
Tumble.Dance.Love,grow,hope:
"you could be happy and I hope you are."
I don't know what I knew before. But now I know I wanna win the war. Sometimes you know more is less.
The truth lies.
The truth lied.
And lies divide.
Lies divide.

Dear Maddy.

This month has been quite the month, blast from the past really.

But today was the event of a life time.

Dear Maddy.

I am sorry that you felt so compelled to find the once lover of Austin Farley. Yes, I am in wonder of the inconvenience you put yourself at to find me, much less the why. However, I'm sure you found all you are looking for (discarding the need for our 'friend ship'), therefor the comfort of my ease I'm sure is not of your intention. Let me assure you, if you had dealt your cards a little smother, I also would not have put myself threw the same inconvenience to discover your intentions of adding me. And in my discovery I found myself a laughing stock, to think of our compelling differences, in every way. I am sorry, so sorry, for it is the punchline witch brings me to tears, doesn't the ex. normally play the role of stalking? No matter, my intentions of this letter are simple, as before stated: I am sorry that you felt so compelled to find the once lover of Austin Farley.
You, my dear, are of no consequence to me. Call me psychotic, but I am not the one chasing around a fear of deprivation. I wish you & Austin nothing more than happiness (a promise once made to a hopeless lover).
Sincerely,
Brittany Castleton



*** txt conversation between Austin & I (4 am).

B: Isn't the ex supposed to play the role of the stalker? Why'd dear Maddy Gail add me on myspace? Whats the need. my profiles not private? Altho I must say her timing is rather quencidntal, you must agree.

A: Quencedental? How?And sorry I didn't know. I never even told her your last name or anything it must have been one of my friends or something that told her it was you.
B: I did not hink it was you. But I still do not understand why she did, if she wanted to fund something out about me she didn't need to add me. So...?...

A; I have no ideah. I'm going to ask her whats tomarrow.

B:Are you happy with her? well duh you are or you wouldn't be dating her, sorry...

A:yea

B:Well good :]. I'm happy for you then. I guess we both changed.

A:Yea.. You with someone

B: Haha I was, he drove me crazy tho, SUPPER clingy. No no, I'm very happy being signal. I go on plenty of dates, but a relationship isn't anything I want.

A:O that's good

B:Yes sir :]. Hey, I need to thank you. You taught me alot of things, You completely changed my world, me beliefs. Any way, I'm glad we are both happy.

A:Ha. yea. Question though, Did she ask or say anything to you?

B: Not really. I mean I asked her how I knew her face around 3 but I had to head out. So I looked at her pictures & figured out who she is, but I wanted to see why she added me so I left her as a friend. But then she replyed no you don't and deleted me as a friend. Seams a little odd to me, I wrote her back a long letter, you can read it.

A:I told her to delete you.

B: Why? lol.

A:Cause if she had a question she should just ask me not my ex. what was the letter about

B: Very smart Austin Farley. I agree very much I told her I was sorry that she had to go out of her way to find me. Basically stating that she should do the very fact you just stated, ask you. But I never said that planly. & that if her intentions where to hurt me, I would be nothing but over joyed to hear you are happy.

A:Yea

B: I still can't figure out why she added me, my profile isn't private. She had a purpose in doing so.

A:Yea idk I'll find out tommarrow. But i'm tired so i'm going back to bed.

B: Haha. Goodnight Austin Farley. & good luck with dear Maddy. Lovely chatting with you.
Madison's reply:
okay...i would just like to let you know. i didn't add you for any of those reasons. i didn't add you cause i thought you were crazy. hun, i to have been called crazy and i completely understand where you are coming from. i hold a quality that most poeple dont posses. its called compassion. i have been called the crazy ex. the reason why i added you was out of simple curiousity. if it bothered you or something im sorry. that was not my intensions. im sorry that we had to have this mishap. please accept my apology, and yes in sincere. if thats how you spell it? lol.


Dear Maddy,
I full heartedly accept your apology. I must admit, I judged you quite rash. I am relived to know your stamina as a person. Things make much more sense now. However I still do not understand why you found the need to add me, my profile is not private. Therefor any digging you wish to aquare could have been done just as simply. No matter now, it's all in the past. Maybe we are not so different. So what was it, my dear, that you where so curious about?
I'm VERY sorry for my accusations, Let me assure you, judgment is not of my natural nature. if you would like to be friends I am fine with that. Altho, I feel Austin would hardly consent. But what is the matter of boys? :) Just kidding. Thank you for your kind words, maturity, & compassion. I am still young, & have much to learn.
tata for now.
Brittany Castleton

Year 1

The one day I could have been spent around so many loving people to keep me safe. Jan 1. It was year 1.
Each one of us go back to reminisce each year our pains & joys. Goal's achieved & set. I will not tatle on about the past, & while it is developing me with each new day. It is the development that would be so intriguing.
I am reminded how big of a difference one person can have on an entire community. That this year, questions will be asked, with answers to receive. Friends aren't defined by the amount of socialization, but by the bond of caring. That bond made will hold your name strong, & fight for everything that they mean.

& Milk shakes will make you pee with a laugh.
It's year one.

“Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.”

Things have finally come around. Theirs two ways to interpret my belief, it's what I conceive, or it's the plan truth. According to my life in general, with ease year one is just be the binging. Weather or not a relationship is grater developed, or our bond will be grater tied. You sir may never know the story you have written, belief you have developed in me, & perhaps greatest of all the lesson you tought:
"if I learned anything at all it was to be true to yourself."
That lesson had lead me to a momentous understanding of life. I have developed the understanding of each letter in the ABC's & slowly I am putting together words, then their definitions. All of witch could not have come with out your bitterly sweet joyfully painful lesson. Thank you.

Thank you,

Dear sweet friends Your words couldn't have meant more to a single soul. For giving me something to believe in, with good memories old & new. For believing in me. For ALWAYS being there, no matter what. My joy is grater than it ever was.
Madison & Lexi you thought me the value of word precision with the arts their in.
The Anderson's & Donelle Teaching was more than experience, more than money, more than time spent with the students, more than helping them develop a talent, more than missing being in class, it was knowing I am loved by so many people. Their smiling faces, excited words to tell me all about their past week, That feeling I got walking threw the door & hearing them say my name with such love.

Because they are my pride a joy!!

Friend ships I have developed even greater.

Hannah

Steph

Stephen

Family

Scott& Danni, Much much more. & onces I've kept.
Cheer

O my justifying reasons why is an absolute insane resolution to live by

You thought me alot about myself. I'm so glad I've had this time to get to know each one of you! You're all amazing & I'm going to miss you. & Stephany Cox couldn't have done this with out you! Thank you all for being more than my squad.

I love my nerdy cheer girls & boys! :)

Year one. I learned to read, you all gave me stories.
love,
2009.